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i’ve been in a bad mood all week. or more like, i’ve been trying to cover up the mood with random crap that doesn’t even help- like i’m missing someone, or like my mind is just begging me to give up and go back to the miserable comfort of locking myself in my house and leaving everything behind.
rephrasing it, i think it’s just me trying to go back to the weird, sick safety of my depression. i hate it, and i hate myself for it. at the same time, it feels like something i’ll never escape. so for now, i’m just trying to figure myself out a bit more, but everyone and everything around me won't let me. maybe they’re just afraid they’ll lose me if i change- i hate that too.
as for my current night drama, there’s not much to tell. i tried to have a friendly talk with someone, but it turned sour and weird, leaving me feeling like shit again. i don’t understand these social rules where i’m to blame for someone elses shitty behhavior, but maybe that's just another weird thing about me.
my brain is just wired this way. like a curse i can’t get away from lol
goodnight, gabeee :- p
rephrasing it, i think it’s just me trying to go back to the weird, sick safety of my depression. i hate it, and i hate myself for it. at the same time, it feels like something i’ll never escape. so for now, i’m just trying to figure myself out a bit more, but everyone and everything around me won't let me. maybe they’re just afraid they’ll lose me if i change- i hate that too.
as for my current night drama, there’s not much to tell. i tried to have a friendly talk with someone, but it turned sour and weird, leaving me feeling like shit again. i don’t understand these social rules where i’m to blame for someone elses shitty behhavior, but maybe that's just another weird thing about me.
my brain is just wired this way. like a curse i can’t get away from lol
goodnight, gabeee :- p
